5.29.2002

I'll just state something now for anyone that might be reading this. If you know me, then you probably have access to this blog by going to my site. My site is a little playground that I hardly visit anymore due to time restrictions and other sites that take up most of my time. But if you have read my blog, then that means that you have some personal connection to me.

And to those that have emailed me concerned that I haven't been okay lately, believe me I am. (thanks c!) N - Thanks for the email. Check your inbox. For the phone calls from the people that have my number, I apologize for putting your story in my blog. Not to spread your business out there, but you do have to understand the meaning behind a blog. It's a way for me to put down how I'm feeling. You probably didn't like it, which is the fuel behind the calls, but remember this is me dealing with my life. As much as you might not like the blog entries, you are a part of my life. You are in my life and due to that fact, I have always written about it.

So don't feel exploited or hung out to dry. If you make the blog then you have had an impact on my life - good or bad. You have had a part in shaping me and my views. So for this one time, I'll change names and pull parts out, but I will warn you, my blogs have always been extremely honest...no-holds-bar honest. And 9 times out of 10 my blogs are about me dealing with a thought or emotion. You (being all inclusive and directed at no one in particular) may start the emotion by something said, done or remembered which then brings new grounding points and understanding to me about myself. Everyone enters my life for a reason - to teach me something new about the person I am. That's the good and evil about life. You are constantly learning, and even better, you have the ability to forever test your limits and your truths. But there's thing that I believe should always be woven in your growth as a person:

Truth.

This is what I usually blog about. The way that I feel - the true way that a situation makes me feel and my response to it. And writing allows me to chronicle my journey and to be able to measure my growth as a human. If you can't be honest with yourself, then what's the point of trying? You should be your toughest critic and strongest supporter.

Do not take this the wrong way, but I'll be honest in expressing something to any and all readers of this blog. If you are afraid of reading this blog, for whatever reason, then I highly recommend not coming back. I rarely go into all the details of entire situations, but I will express my reactions to them. I'll truthfully put down how they make me feel because it's a great way to understand those feelings and work through them.

This is my way of keeping up with what life throws my way and more importantly, how it changes me.

- janessa